I continued to look for young guys that I knew I would never have to worry about developing feelings for.  I kept chasing that high, that rush.  But it was slowly beginning to fade with each conquest.  I needed more, like a junkie.  I swiped right on this younger guy that played baseball at a college nearby.  I couldn’t tell much from his pictures other than he seemed cute. We matched online, exchanged snapchats, and began chatting.

I would invite him over once in a while, but he never came over and didn’t really seem about it.  In the moment, that was fine by me because I was getting my next fix from whoever else was coming along.  Then he started to invite me to hang out, and I would blow him off. Eventually, I decided to give in and just go with it.  What’s the worst it could be?

He showed up shortly after I had gotten home from being out and about.  It was dark, and he had just come from his off-campus apartment.  I was cleaning up in the kitchen when he knocked on the door.  I yelled for him to come in.  As the door opened, I looked up to see what he looked like.  He was short…much shorter than he pretended to be in those photographs on Bumble.  I would guess he was probably 5’5/5’6 (and the baseball roster lists him at 5’10).  So that was strike one.

He closed the front door and made his way towards me.  “Hey,” he said.  His voice sounded nasally, hoarse, and unpleasant.  It was a voice that you would hear from a cartoon character, or that someone makes to sound funny.

“Hey how’s it going?” I replied.

“I’m good,” he continued.  He didn’t cough or clear his throat.  It was confirmed, this was his actual voice.  Strike 2.

I didn’t really want him there anymore.  The fantasy of fucking a tall young college baseball player was turning into a sobering reality by the second.  Should I tell him to leave?  Can he be good for something?  He had the confidence to come over here knowing how much older and experienced I am.  I figured I’d see what he was about but was very doubtful that the experience would be worth remembering.

I brought him into my bedroom where we jumped into my bed and began kissing. There was some PG-13 over the shirt touching and things really weren’t moving fast enough for me.  At this point, I wanted to get this guy gone.  In retrospect, I should have just asked him to leave.  Instead I thought I would just jerk him off really quick and then he could leave.

I pushed him off of me, and now he was kneeling on my bed in front of me.  I unbuttoned his pants and unzipped, pulled then down to him knees and did the same with his boxers.  And there it was, his rock-hard penis.  It was a little bigger than I had expected, given that he was so short.  Now to getting the job  done, I wrapped my right hand around it and gave it a tug.  I decided to put him in my mouth for a few jerks to add some lubrication.  So back and forth I went for maybe twenty seconds.

“Ahhh I’m gonna come,” he moaned in his annoying voice.

I took my mouth off and kept jerking.  “What?” I said as he came.  I was shocked. I had never experienced anything like this before.  I thought, okay that was effortless, now he can leave. But of course, nothing ever goes that easy.

I got up and grabbed some tissues from the bathroom for him to clean himself off.  I brought them back to him in the bedroom.  “Just give me a minute,” he said.  He wanted more?  The short version is that he got it up again. We had sex and it was okay. He lasted longer and it was enjoyable. I didn’t come, but he did again.  Shortly after, he was out the door. I ended up getting some snaps here and there from him, and also heard that he bragged to the baseball team about our encounter.  I guess his version was much different than mine. I never reached out to him again.

After his quick draw, that should have been strike 3.  Looking back, I’m not really sure why I allowed him to stay.  I maybe didn’t have the confidence to tell him to leave.  Regardless, I realized I needed to switch up my focus and go for some older men.  Bumble wasn’t going to cut it. I needed something else, something taboo. The next morning I signed up for Ashley Madison and Seeking Arrangement.